Let me introduce you to the man above, he goes by Jeff. He is about mid forties, maybe married. I'm almost positive he spends too much time in online chat rooms and has an extensive armada of collectors edition G. I. Joe action figures (still in mint condition and in there case). Every Tuesday night , after he gets off from his lunch shift as a Denny's chef, I use the word chef lightly though. I mean come on now, what completely half baked college freshman couldn't make an omelet just as adequate as this guys. None the less, This man clocks out from his day to day mundane life and ventures down the street to some hole in the wall bar , I'm gonna go with the name Barefoot Bernie's and He become "Captain Karaoke" . Jeff no longer exist and he's placed under a spotlight. In his mind, Elton John and Him are on stage together. Elton's busy tickling the ivories while The Captain is on top of the piano singing about electric boots and a mohair suit. He literally is Benny and The Jets. The song finally ends and all seven locals in the bar give him a round of applause. The rest on his night is spent waiting to get back on that stage and become someone else once again.
This is why karaoke continues to reoccur, because it's damn sure not the talent. How many times have you heard some pack of drunk girls, most likely celebrating someone 23rd birthday, butcher some song like Goodbye Earl by the Dixie Chicks or The Power of Love by Celine Dion. Karaoke is not just the idea of people being able to have a good time and let go. For the avid karaoke goer, it is the escape. For those brief 4 minutes and 29 seconds the karaoke addict becomes Elton John and his omelet job is no longer existing. Better yet, If he does a good job on stage, the seven acquaintances in the bar, instantaneously become his best friends because I mean come on what doesn't bring people together like alcohol and the ability to sing along to Billy Joel's Piano Man. So what does karaoke do? Karaoke gives this shmuck the feeling of being free, being something he's not and This is where his alter ego begins. "Captain Karaoke" would never flip fry your bacon for you. Captain Karaoke always has the ability to woo the women with his velvet like voice and Captain Karaoke does not drive a hatchback 1994 Honda Civic. This is exactly why Karaoke can be dangerous. It can truly become a drug, and that feeling of being someone else, addictive.
Go with me on this one. What if Karaoke was recognized as an addiction. What if KA meetings we're held in the playroom of methodist churches across the country. Every meeting would begin with people like Jeff describing close incounters with audio equipment and his almost set back with a megaphone. I would just have to sit through one of those meetings, just once.
Karaoke is pretty much like any drug honestly. It gives the addict false feelings and for certain amount of time the ability to escape from it all. Is it as dangerous? Obviously not. Embarrassing though? You know it.
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